Nightmares
by animegirl336
Summary: The fight against Majin Buu had toyed with several people's emotions. For Vegeta, it also resurfaced old memories he had long ago repressed. HCT. *****My formatting didn't save! I'm sorry!*****


**A/N: Hey guys! Yes, this is part of my HCT. I'm writing a HUGE chapter right now for _Gohan's Journal_. I'm trying to fit all of the Buu saga into one chapter, but it might end up being a two-parter. Then we get into DBS! Yay!**

 **This is just a small something post-Buu to hold you guys over until that chapter goes up (it's going to be a while, sorry! I'm a really busy girl!)**

 **Enjoy!**

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Everything was quiet in Capsule Corporation that morning. It was no later than two-thirty A.M. Bulma and Vegeta lay sleeping in their bed. The stars were bright, the ones that you could see anyway. There were a few clouds here and there in the sky. There was a little frost on the grass outside, a sign that winter was fast approaching. If you were awake, you would hear a low hum coming from Dr. Briefs' lab, as he was up early working on some nutty contraption. Trunks was asleep, dreaming about fighting some powerful opponent, and gaining glory; he was his father's son after all.

And speaking of said father, his peaceful sleeping was soon quite reckless. Bulma was awakened by his jerking movements. His legs were twitching, like he was walking to bending down or something. His arms were still, but his fingers were balled up into loose fists. His mouth wasn't moving, but muttering noises came out it as if he were speaking. It was unintelligible babber, and it didn't sound very happy.

Bulma groaned as she sat up, annoyed to be awake so early in the morning. She had been up past midnight working and had only been sleeping for a short while. She looked next to her to see what had awakened her. She sighed when she noticed that it was her husband. "Not again..." She gently pushed him a bit, trying to shake him out of his nightmare. Right as she touched him, he jumped out of the bed, landing awake on the floor. His breaths were shaky and heavy.

He rubbed his head, the unfortunate casualty of his surprise. The first thing he said, of course, was yelling at her. "Why am I on the floor, woman! Did you push me?"

"You were having another nightmare, Vegeta." She told him, lying back down and closing her eyes.

"Nonsense!" He yelled and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. She stood up and walked over to that window, watching him as he walked across the lawn to the GR. It was the same thing every time, and it confused Bulma to no end. He hasn't had those nightmares in years.

When Vegeta had first started living at Capsule Corporation after the explosion of Namek, it had been out of pure generosity. Bulma still didn't know why she had allowed it. But she had. Vegeta had been given his own room and everything seemed fine. As long as he had a place to train, sleep, and eat then he wouldn't kill anybody on Earth. The Z Fighters, hesitant as they were, had accepted his deal. They figured it was better than leaving it up to chance whether or not Vegeta would try and return to his former occupation of mass genocide.

After a week or so, Bulma had woken up in the middle of the night. She heard screaming coming from his room. Slightly concerned she walked over and knocked on his door. He didn't reply to her, but just kept screaming and, what sounded like, pleading. She knocked again and again, but still he hadn't answered. Not even an insult. Concern growing, she took her chances and entered his room. She gasped when she saw he was kicking and screaming in his bed. Vegeta was having a nightmare. She tried to desperately wake him up, and when all else had failed she pulled the mattress up and dumped him onto the floor.

He had woken up and immediately started screaming at Bulma. He yelled about her being in his room without his permission. He yelled at her for dumping him on the floor. And he yelled about random things too. He yelled at her about the GR. He yelled at her that her cooking was terrible. He yelled at her for being an 'overall bitch'. She took what he threw at her and retaliated. She called him an 'ungrateful, stupid monkey'. He fumed after she said that, as if it had actually upset him. He pushed her across the room, her back hitting the wall and she fell to the floor. He had walked over to where she sat and held a blue ball of ki right in front of her face. When he spoke, his voice was low and quiet. He spoke through gritted teeth. What he said had haunted her nightmares.

"I can kill you anytime I want. Remember that."

Bulma hadn't interfered with his nightmares after that night, and a year before the androids' appearance they had stopped. She had never found out what they were about, and she never brought it up to him again. But recently they started again. A day or so after the defeat of Kid Buu they had returned. It became nearly impossible to ignore them now that they shared a bed. She tried not to wake him up if she could, and she got an earful whenever she did. Luckily, his nightmares didn't seem as bad as they used to be. He wasn't screaming and kicking, just muttering and jerking a little bit.

Bulma didn't give it another thought until around midday. Trunks was already hungrily chewing down in his lunch and she had to go fetch Vegeta from his training. She knocked on the door of the GR. When nothing happened she knocked again. She wished she could just enter, but she knew better than that. With the intense gravity that trained under, she would be crushed. She continued to knock, as yelling would be useless. The GR was soundproof. She kicked and banged on the door, shouting even though she knew it wouldn't work.

Frustrated and stubborn she opened the door, careful not to enter. Vegeta, as she had expected, was dripping with sweat and breathing heavily. His head snapped over to where she stood, hands on her hips and lips pursed. "It's lunchtime."

"Did I tell you to come in?" He yelled. Bulma raised an eyebrow. "Answer me, woman!"

Bulma rolled her eyes. "No, your highness, you didn't."

"Then out!" He yelled. Bulma didn't move. "OUT!"

Suddenly, Bulma had flashbacks to the most recent World Martial Arts Tournament. She remembered the evil look Vegeta had on his face and all the people he had killed. She remembered that he had almost killed her; something she thought he'd never be able to do. She backed up a couple steps from the GR. "I...just wanted to tell you...lunch is ready..." She said slowly and quietly. She had never been afraid of her husband, not since Namek. Now, though, she felt fear toward the Saiyan in front of her.

Vegeta slammed his fist down on a button, shutting off the gravity. Bulma, thinking this was an invitation inside, tentatively stepped forward. Vegeta responded by pushing her out and into the grass. She scrambled to her feet. "V-Vegeta! Don't push me! Do you think you can just do whatever you want?" A small growl escaped his mouth, and Bulma backed up again, a feeling of fear and uncertainty filling her stomach. "What's gotten into you?"

"I am not someone you want to mess with, earthling." Vegeta hissed, his speech like venom. The last word spit out his mouth like it was a weapon, as if the word could stab her.

Bulma shook her head. "All I did...was make-"

"Away!" He pointed to the house. "I want you out of my sight!"

She huffed, putting her hands on her hips. "Fine! Be an asshole! I don't give a shit anyways!"

He shoved her yet again, much stronger this time. She fell to the ground and he was over her before she could stand back up. He picked her up and held her against the wall. "Say that again. I. Dare. You."

"F-Fine. Be an...asshole. I d-don't give a...shit...anyways." She repeated, not about to let him win. His hostility was matched only by her stubbornness. His eyes were nearly bulging out of his face, a vein in his forehead clearly visible. He dropped her.

Suddenly, Bulma felt a sense of déjà vu. It was just like before. His voice even sounded the same, triggering a deep fear in her. He held a blue ki ball up to her face. She somehow remembered it being closer to her face. It was still close enough to make her sweat, but not as bad as before. She didn't get to think about it long, his words interrupted her thoughts.

"I can kill you anytime I want. Remember that."

He dissolved the ki ball. His anger seemed to subside, but was still there. He stood there and stared at her. He did say anything, he didn't make any moves - be them violent or passive - he just stood there. Bulma didn't dare say anything, lest she make him angry again. She searched his body language for a sign, any sign, as to what he was feeling. And she saw one. His facial expression, it held a stern frown, but...something about it was different. She was only able to maintain eye contact for a few seconds before he walked away. Seconds after he disappeared inside the house, Trunks came running out.

"Mom!" He called as he ran toward her. "Are you okay? I saw everything from my bedroom window! Did Dad actually hurt you?"

Bulma shakily stood up, ignoring the hand that her son offered her. She shook her head. "No, Trunks. Your father didn't hurt me." She smiled at the worried expression on the eight-year-old's face. "You know him, all bark and no bite when it comes to us; unless you're training with him, that is."

Trunks nodded. "Yeah, I know that he wouldn't actually hurt us. But he seemed serious just now. He looked pissed!"

Bulma leaned forward and pet his hair, placing a gentle kiss on her son's forehead. "Your father and I had a miscommunication, that all." She stood up straight and turned to go back into the house. She paused, however, and called one more sentence out to Trunks as an afterthought. "And watch your language young man!"

Bulma awoke to screaming. Loud, fearful screaming. Her first thought was that someone or something was attacking the planet; she was still shaken up by Majin Buu. Her eyes fearfully darted around the room with a speed and energy that shouldn't be been possible at four in the morning. Her eyes landed on the source of her screams: the Prince. Before she could react to her observation she felt a kick make contact with her knee. A hard kick. A bruise almost immediately started forming right where she got kicked. It didn't take her genius brain to realize that he wasn't suppressing his energy in his sleep. This was going to be a very dangerous job, but she didn't dare wake up Trunks if Vegeta's screams haven't already done so.

"Vegeta." She said loudly, but was careful not to yell. She reached out to touch his arm. As soon as her fingertips brushed against his skin, he retaliated. He grabbed onto her upper arm and flung her over the bed, behind Vegeta and onto the floor. It took her a minute, but she stood back up and now fully awake. "Two can play at this game." She challenged. She walked down to her kitchen and got a glass of water to pour on him. It usually works in the movies, she thought. She walked back into her room and waited for a lull in his kicking before dumping it on him. This only seemed to make him worse, as his screaming got louder and his movements became more frantic.

Thoroughly scared, Bulma didn't know what else to do. She had never seen him so afraid before, and none of his nightmares recently or years back had been this bad. She hurriedly searched through the house, stealth completely forgotten, as she tried to find something to wake up her sleeping husband. She tried everything from hitting him with an object to waving food in front of his nose (which is usually a sure-fire way to wake up a Saiyan). She tried calling out to him, now 100% sure that everyone else in the household was awake. Why they hadn't interfered, Bulma hadn't a clue, but she was thankful for it. She didn't dare sit back down on her bed, her knee killing her.

All out of options, she climbed back into the bed. She avoided his flurry of frantic and uncoordinated attacks to the best of her ability. She could tell that he wasn't thinking about his attacks. She's seen him fight seriously more than once, and this was not his style. She managed to avoid most of them, but taking damage was inevitable, and she had plenty of black-and-blue marks to prove it by the time she reached Vegeta's side of the bed. She firmly reached out and grabbed his wrists, which he responded quite violently to. "Vegeta!" She yelled. It was like riding a mechanical bull. She refused to let go of his wrists. "Vegeta! Wake up! Listen to me!" He didn't stop. She was about ready to give up completely when he finally stopped throwing himself around like he was having a seizure. He stopped after she said, "Vegeta! It's just me! It's Bulma! Bulma!"

When he stopped jerking, she had him pinned down. And she came to a shocking realization. He wasn't asleep. His eyes were wide open and full of fear. He didn't even look like he was trying to mask it. When had he woken up? She spoke slowly to him. He seemed distant, like part of his wasn't there. "Hi Vegeta." No responce. "You were having another nightmare...I think..."

Vegeta shook his head. "Lies!" His voice was just as cold and full of anger as it normally was, juxtaposing from his out-of-character terror-filled look. "Now let me sleep, woman!"

She shook her head. "No Vegeta, your nightmares need to stop now. I let you deal with it yourself last time, but not this time." Their conversation was interrupted by a knock on their door. "Now I'm going to answer the door. Just sit up, OK?" She didn't wait for his response as she scooted off the bed to answer her bedroom door. As she had expected, it was a concerned family member. "What's up, Trunks?"

Trunks rubbed the back of his neck. "I, uh, heard screaming. I thought it was Dad. Is everything alright?"

Bulma nodded. "Of course it is, don't worry about it."

"Are you sure? Because I can go to Goten's if it's not or ask Grandpa to take me out for a while or-"

Bulma silence him with a finger to his lips. "We're fine, son. Just go back to sleep."

Trunks stood there for a minute longer before hesitantly walking back to his room. He was muttering to himself all the way down the hallway and Bulma let it slide. She had more important issues to deal with. She shut her bedroom door and turned to face Vegeta. For whatever reason, he was standing up. Once she saw him, he started slowly walking toward her. His facial expression back to its normal apathetic self. Bulma smiled, glad to see him back to how he was before that horrible scene. Once he reached her, he pushed down on her shoulder causing her to sit on the ground.

She grew confused, but soon felt fear as the scene played out for a third time before her. But it was less violent this time. He lifted his arm and held a blue ki ball in front of her face. Again, it seemed even farther away than last time. It wasn't even close enough to cause her to sweat. When he spoke, his words weren't filled with nearly as much venom and anger as last time. This time, they sounded stern but weak. They sounded forced; they sounded rehearsed.

"I can kill you anytime I want. Remember that."

He lowered the ki ball and dissolved it, just like he had the last two times. But, unlike the last two times, he walked away immediately and sat on their bed, his back to Bulma. Bulma sat there, perplexed by Vegeta's strange behavior. C'mon Bulma! You're a genius! You can figure this out! And then it hit her. These last two scenarios, she hadn't felt as threatened by his threat. He wasn't going to make good it. And it sounded rehearsed, like he didn't want to say anything else. And it was always the same line, something he knew she would recognize when she heard it. More specifically, it was a line he knew she'd remember from the last time he was having nightmares. Bulma's expression saddened a bit when she realized: this was his way of asking for help.

She stood up and sat down behind him on the bed. She placed a hand on his back. His skin was surprisingly warm. "I'm here, Vegeta. I'm here for you." He grunted, showing her that he had heard her. "Talk to me, please, about these nightmares. What are they about."

"I do not wish to speak of them."

She sighed. "C'mon, maybe talking about them will help them go away. You can trust me. I pinky promise that I won't tell anyone what you tell me!" She held out her pinky finger toward him.

Vegeta spoke, but she did not lock pinkies with her. He only rolled his eyes and gave an annoyed groan at the gesture. He said but one word. "Frieza."

Bulma raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Frieza? But he's been dead for years."

"I knew you wouldn't understand. You're only a weak, puny earthling." He said the word again with anger and venom. It only then occurred to her that he hadn't used her name once since the nightmare ordeal started up again. He stood up and headed for the door, returning to his usual routine of harsh training after a nightmare. She, however, rushed as fast as she could to get in front of him and block the door so he couldn't get through.

"Not so fast, mister!" Bulma exclaimed. "You are going to sit back down. On that bed. And talk to me!"

"What bruised you?" Vegeta asked, changing the subject. Surprised, Bulma looked down to see the brownish-purple marks that covered every visible part of her body and probably parts that were covered by her pink night slip. She looked back up. His gaze nor his expression had shifted since he had asked. He still looked just as apathetic as always. Bulma waited for him to say something else, not wanting to answer his question. At this point, she would have preferred the phycopathic-angry-killer Vegeta rather than stoic-stubborn-asshole Vegeta. When it became apparent that he was not moving until she answered, Bulma tried to carefully work her way around it.

"That's not important," she said, waving her hand, "so just go sit down, your highness."

Vegeta stood there, still as a statue. Again, she waited for his angry yelling or his frustrated exits. But nothing of the sort came. "You didn't answer my question, woman. I want to know how you got damaged inside this facility this early in the morning hours."

Bulma sighed. Here we go... "You." Vegeta raised an eyebrow. He opened his mouth to speak, but closed it when nothing came out. That's right...he had woken up at some point during his fit...he must remember attacking someone... "I was trying to calm-"

"There's your mistake! I told you many years ago not to approach me or have anything to do with me when I'm asleep. Did I not make myself clear?" He asked, a bit quickly. His words were barely annunciated and almost slurred together, like when a little kid talks to fast.

Bulma shook her head, not having moved from her position, arms straight out, in front of the door. "You don't understand-"

"I certainly do. I believe it is you who does not understand the situation, as I had pointed out earlier. Now let me through!" He said, pushing her aside. But, she noticed, it was a gentle push. The softest, actually, that he had ever touched her. It had felt as if he were afraid to touch her. He doesn't want to bruise me anymore...

"No!" She shouted, grabbing his arm. She pulled with all her might, but the Prince just kept walking seemingly unaffected by the force being exerted behind him. She tried kicking him and yelling at him and even biting him. But nothing worked. In the end, she just sank down when they reached her back porch. That caused Vegeta to stop once he was halfway across the lawn. "Just go train. As long as it...makes you feel better." Bulma caved. She stood back up and walked up to her room. What had she been thinking? Vegeta wasn't the kind of guy to talk, he's a fighter. A cold, ruthless, emotionless fighter. Bulma thought herself stupid for trying to help him feel better.

She jumped a bit when she heard her bedroom door open. She was already prepared to give a lecture to Trunks when she looked over and saw her husband. She rolled her eyes and laid back down, ignoring his presence. Probably just came up to grab some armor or something. Best if I don't interfere. "He's a menace."

Bulma sat back up when he spoke. She turned to look at him. He was at at the edge of the bed, eyes staring at something in the distance though only a wall was in front of the Saiyan. "What?"

"I am not repeating myself, so listen well." Vegeta told her. Bulma nodded. "As you already know, my home world was destroyed when I was only of six years. It wasn't until I was an adult that I found out what really happened; the story that you know. But for most of my childhood, teenage years, and early adulthood I was working for Frieza. Each day consisted of waking up, a measly serving of food that would leave even a human dissatisfied, and intense training or horrible, unspeakable torture."

Bulma tapped him, attempting to get his attention. Annoyed, he slowly turned his head toward her. "What...kind of 'torture' did he do to you?"

"I can't say." Vegeta explained. "Most of it are in those nightmares I have. Some of the things that Frieza had put me through I wouldn't wish upon anybody but him. Not Cell, not Buu, not Kakarot." Bulma nodded, accepting the ambiguous answer. "No more interruptions, do you understand me?"

"Yes sir."

Vegeta grunted. "I dreamt about that monster for decades and they became nightmares after my death on Namek by his hand. They did, however, dissipate when my mind became focused on the approaching threat of the androids and my goal to achieve the level of Super Saiyan. Recently..." He paused, taking a breath. She could tell that he didn't want to do this at all. So why is he? "Majin Buu had gotten me thinking. I made the decision to have my mind taken over by Babidi so that I could get stronger. So that I could go back to the way I was before. Killing, traveling around space getting stronger. I felt I could only do that with the help of Babidi's magic reconnecting me with the evil in my heart. I knew I couldn't go back to the way I was before if I had a family that I cared for."

Bulma felt her heart flutter. Did Vegeta just, indirectly, say that he does care for her? And for Trunks? That was too good to believe. She wanted to interrupt. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and give him a big kiss. But she knew better. She wanted Vegeta to keep talking, and if she interrupted him again, she'd never have this opportunity again. She used all the will-power she had to keep her infamous big-mouth shut.

"I killed lots of people. My Saiyan blood was pumping fast, the familiar rush of adrenaline was with it. I'd be lying if I said that I hadn't enjoyed it." Vegeta smirked at the memory. "I killed at least two-thirds of the audience that day. I believe I fired at you as well. At first, I had aimed right at you...but at the last second I changed my aim just the slightest, allowing you all to live. With my mind under Babidi's spell, I had not I idea what possessed my to do that.

"And as the day went on, I got to fight Kakarot. But our fight had allowed Majin Buu to be awakened. None of us - Kakarot, the brat, the boy, the mini-Kakarot, or myself - had the power that was required to destroy that demon. With Kakarot not there and the brat being presumed dead, I knocked out the little ones. I made sure that Piccolo and baldie had gotten them out of there before I did anything rash. And yes, I will admit, my decision had been rash. I thought that if I was going to die, I was to die on my own terms. And I would take Buu with me."

Bulma's eyes widened when she realized what he was implying. That feeling...what Goku had said... Bulma spoke without thinking. Her out burst sounding a lot like Chi-Chi. "Did you even think about your family when you decided to go explode yourself?"

"Yes!" Vegeta yelled back. "Yes, woman! I thought about you, the boy, even Kakarot! If I took out Buu when I and the chance, I might be gone but you would be safe!" Bulma lowered her gaze to the floor, automatically feeling bad about her angry outburst. "It was the most...trying battle that I had been in. In multiple ways. That's why it brought back the nightmares that I had years prior."

When he stopped talking, Bulma waited for him to continue. When he didn't, she took that as her invitation to speak. "You still haven't answered my original question. What are your nightmares about - other than Frieza torturing you?"

"I've already told you more than you need to know." Vegeta said, "There is nothing more that I need to say."

Bulma scooted over and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tight. To her surprise, he returned the hug. "Just tell me, Vegeta." She whispered. "Please."

Vegeta's voice was just as quiet as Bulma's. His whisper didn't sound angry or annoyed. It didn't sound like anything. But if Bulma had to put a description on it, she'd put fearful. Whether he was scared of his nightmares or scared to tell her, she didn't know. "Of you. And of the boy."

"Of us?" Bulma replied almost instantly. Her curiosity had overridden her common sense. But her voice still didn't rise above a whisper. "Why are we nightmares to you, Vegeta?"

Vegeta shook his head, but didn't explain why. Instead, he continued. "At first, my nightmares were about Frieza. Plain and simple. But after about two years of living here...they branched out. They became less PTSD related and more fear driven. These were the worse ones. I have learned to handle anything Frieza can dish out to me physically, whether it be in real life or in a dream, but this was completely new territory. These were the ones that I can remember every detail of, from what day of the week they took place in to what clothes people were wearing in them. These are details that no human, or Saiyan, is supposed to remember about something as trivial as a dream. Or in this case, a nightmare."

"Fear?" Bulma questioned, the first one of the two not to speak in a whisper in minutes. Her voice was still quiet, but it was not a whisper. "What kind of fear can someone like Frieza inflict on you that you can't dish right back at him?"

"I have something that he lacks." Vegeta told her.

Bulma looked up at his face. "And what is that?"

"A family."

Bulma frowned. Yes, she was extremely happy to hear Vegeta referring to them as a family. But if his nightmares had something to do with Frieza and with them, she knew it wouldn't be good. Despite herself, though, she felt butterflies in her stomach when he said it. Not just because she loves him, but because she could have sworn that he tightened his hold on her just the slightest when he had said that. "What?" Vegeta didn't continue after she asked the question. She, herself, wasn't even sure what she was asking about, but something had to be said. After a while, when no one had said anything for nearly ten minutes, Bulma spoke up again. "What happens in your nightmares about us?"

To her surprise, Vegeta answered quickly. Because of this, he didn't have time to hide the emotion that dripped from, his words. "Don't make me talk about it...Please..."

Please... The word reverberated through Bulma's skull. Never, in all the years she has known and lived with Vegeta, has she ever heard him say 'please'. She opened her mouth to respond, but closed it when nothing came out. She didn't know how to respond. She was too flabbergasted. She tried again to speak, but her vocal cords were not responding to her brain. For the first time in her life, Bulma was unable to add in her two cents. She rubbed his back with her hands, not breaking from the hug. It was the most comfort her mind was able to allow at that moment in time. They stayed in silence yet again, but this one was different. There was no cliffhangers in the air. This was a comfortable silence.

"You..." Vegeta spoke up, startling Bulma. She had expected the conversation to be over for the night. She was happy just to stay in his arms - something he very rarely allowed. She didn't dare speak or move, lest he shut her out again. Heck, she barely dared to breath. "...and the boy..." With each word Vegeta said, Bulma heard his voice waver more and more. For the first time ever, that Bulma knew about, Vegeta was nearing his breaking point. Her heart ached for him. "...Frieza, he..." Vegeta paused again. He inhaled and exhaled deeply, obviously trying to regain his composure. "In my youth, I had nothing of my own. My planet, my race, my throne, and any worldly possessions that I had owned were quickly gotten rid of by my sixth year. Frieza had provided me with food, a living quarters, and armor to train in. All of which were owned by him.

"Once in a while, on missions of genocide on alien planets, I would scavenge an item and keep it as my own. I learned very quickly not to do such a thing. Frieza always made sure that I had nothing. I learned not to care. By my eighth year, I wasn't even acknowledging my own day of birth. This was normal. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, for I had known no other way of life. The one I had on my home planet I had been too young to remember. I can only recall sparse details about life on that planet, though I cling to it and claim everyday my pride in my race and our culture.

"Then...I started living here on Earth. Everyone on this mudball was - is - so greedy. Everyone had so much, yet I had never owned a thing since I was but a small boy. And the worst part was that the inhabitants of this planet didn't even know what they had. They took it all for granted. I would have killed millions for a single 'pencil' of my own, growing up with Frieza. Even those who are considered 'poverty stricken' on this planet lived better than I. It angered me beyond anything I had felt before. I had made a promise to myself halfway through my seventh year. I promised that I would never be greedy. I would never hold anything dear to me - a concept which I didn't even know what meant and had only heard about - and I would never own anything. For if I had nothing, then there was nothing for Frieza to take or destroy. I could not further be hurt if I did not let myself be hurt.

"And yet...living on this planet had an undesired effect on me. I became one of those greedy bastards I so despise. Though I still let little in, some things had seeped through cracks I hadn't recognized were there." Vegeta paused there, allowing everything in his long rant to sink into Bulma's large cranium. She listened to everything he said with intent. She wanted to know this. She wanted to know the man she married. "Those clever, deceiving, tricky things that had seeped through...it all started with you, woman. You managed to get through my well-trained defenses. I don't know how you did it, nor why I let you, but I had let you into my life.

"And then came the boy. I'll admit, the first thought that had come to my mind was that there would be an heir to the throne; that a Saiyan warrior more dedicated than the brat was now a possibility. I thought this way for quite a while. Yet, after the Cell Games...I saw the boy differently. Whether it was the knowledge that he'd become a Super Saiyan or witnessing his death, I don't know. But, slowly, the boy, too, had managed to make it into my life. I hadn't noticed, not until Babidi came around. I saw how soft I had become; how I was breaking every promise that I had made to myself. I felt angry. I didn't know what to do but get stronger by any means possible. My entire life, strength had determined worthiness and how much respect you received.

"But even before then...I had begun to have nightmares again. You didn't notice them because they weren't bad enough for my physical body to react at all. After we fought Buu, they increased ten-fold, for during that battle I had realized how much you two had meant to me." Vegeta paused. His face seemed panicked, like he was groping for words to cover up what he had just admitted. They, however, didn't come in time. Bulma looked away from his face and instead put her ear to his chest. She listened to his rhythmic heartbeat. It calmed her a bit, her anxiety subsiding. It quickly retuned, however, when she heard a sniffle. Her body tensed, not knowing what other reaction to have. She wasn't prepared for this. "I had allowed myself two things...two things of my own. I had convinced myself that merely two things weren't greedy.

"But then...my guilt invaded my nightmares. Freiza...he..." Bulma heard his voice crack at the end of his phrase. Suddenly, fear grew in her. What horrible, grotesque nightmares did her husband have that would make a man as proud and strong-willed as him cry? She had heard once from Goku that he has seen Vegeta cry. He said it happened on Namek as Vegeta lay on the ground on his deathbed. She couldn't imagine such a thing and had insisted that Goku had made it up. But as she sat here, awake and alive, she held her husband tight as she experienced something unfamiliar and extremely unexpected - she'd expected to get struck twice by lightning before ever having to deal with this - a crying Vegeta. "...he..." The blue-haired woman felt something wet hit the top of her head. She looked up to find out the cause. She couldn't stop the gasp that escaped her lips when she saw what she did.

Vegeta was looking up at the ceiling, lips curled inward in a tight frown. His chin was bouncing up and down slightly but rapidly. Even with the limited light in the room, Bulma could see how very pink and slightly puffy his face was. And, scariest of all, she saw the straight, wet line that started at the bottom of his eye and streaked down to under his chin. She saw another slip down his face, his face growing more and more upset with each one. She could tell that his weakness was frustrating him beyond belief. For a moment, she feared for her safety. Vegeta was a violent man when angry. But, after a few seconds, gave his torso a slight squeeze to show him that she was still there and still listening; she was still being quiet just like he had asked.

"...he..." Vegeta tried again. If they hadn't been the only two people in the room, Bulma would have thought that the word had come out of someone else's mouth. It didn't sound like Vegeta at all. It sounded weak and sad. It sounded broken. It sounded sob-like. Another wet drop fell on her head, this time landing on her forehead. "Horrible things. Awful. Unspeakable. Kill you both, torture you both, and worse. He'd capture you, he'd make you his slave, he'd...he'd take it. The two things I had allowed myself to have and he'd take them both, treating you guys worse than he ever did me. I could fight in his army. You were both methods of him trying to break me. He just...takes. God damn fucking takes all I have!" Vegeta ranted. The further he had gotten into it, the worse he got. Eventually, he was leaning on her for support and not the other way around. He placed his face in the crook of her neck. She felt her skin get soaked immediately.

"I'm right here." Bulma cooed, supporting his weight. He was barely holding himself together. She thought she had entered a parallel universe. But, as Goku had taught her, Saiyans did have emotions other than anger, even though they chose not to show them. And Bulma felt honored and appreciated to know that she was the only one, other than Goku, who got the privilege of witnessing Vegeta have emotions. She ran a hand through his hair.

She felt him shake a little, a hint that he had let out a silent sob. "Don't leave me again. You're all I have."

He didn't have to elaborate. Bulma already knew what he meant. When Majin Buu had killed me...it was still bothering him. Had he really felt that bad about her death? Bulma didn't believe it. She couldn't. In her mind, the only logical explanation for what he had said was because of the trauma he had from Frieza, not because he felt any affection for her.

But she did love him.

"What makes you think that I would leave?" She questioned, her voice drenched in seriousness. Did he not trust her as well?

"Nothing good lasts. Nothing is forever." He told her. Her heart skipped a beat. Did Vegeta really think that her being in his life was a good thing? That she was a good thing? She quickly brushed the idea aside. She knew how he felt and that wasn't it. It was just the PTSD speaking.

She reached up and cupped his cheek, forcing him to look at her. She was surprised by how easily his head moved. He really was weak, wasn't he? "Your past is exactly that: the past." She told him. She was mainly talking about Frieza, but by calling it 'his past' she also included his old occupation of genocidal maniac. "I'm here. Now. In the present. Away from all of that."

At that, he started muttering to himself. Most of that he said was unintelligible babber. Bulma did, however, manage to make out some of it. Eventually she realized that he was chanting the same mantra over and over again. He probably didn't even realize he was saying it out loud, for if he had he wouldn't be chanting it. "Don't leave me...don't leave me...don't leave me..."

Bulma smiled. A small glimmer of hope appeared, clogging her lungs and blocking her airways. Love threatened to burst out of her ribcage and abdomen. Maybe he does care...just a little bit... Bulma spoke it a whisper next, hoping that Vegeta wouldn't hear her over his muttering. "I'm glad that your affection for me is as strong as your fear of Frieza."

He kept repeating the mantra, obviously not having heard her. It went on like that until the sun was peeking up from behind the horizon. Dawn had arrived, and Bulma had less then two hours of sleep from that night. She sighed. She knew it was going to be another long day. She could already hear Trunks speeding around the house, probably to locate the phone. "Mom! Can Goten come over and play?" He yelled from downstairs. Bulma shook her head, smiling.

Those boys are going to be the death of Chi-Chi and I... "Sure sweetie! Just make user it's okay with Chi-Chi before you-" she was cut off when she heard the back door slamming shut. A quick glance at her window revealed her son flying in the direction of the Son residence. Bulma was pulled out of her thoughts when she felt Vegeta carry his own weight again. He wiped off his face with his arm. The pink color and puffyness were already gone. If she hadn't seen it, she would have never known he was crying. He was great at recovering. But she still had an important question to ask. "Hey...Vegeta?"

"What is it, woman?" Vegeta replied. His voice was just as gruff and held just as much annoyance and arrogance as it normally did. See Her husband back to normal brought a smile to her face.

"Why'd you tell me all of that?" Bulma asked. She ran her fingers through her hair.

He grunted. Bulma sighed, not expecting an answer. He had already admitted more than Bulma had ever expected him to. She wasn't going to push her luck any further. She stood up and walked over to her dresser, picking out her clothes for the day. As smart and brave as she was, she had always like clothes. It confused everyone she knew. She had already picked out her shorts and long-sleeve shirt and was looking for a belt when she heard her bedroom door open. Switching her attention to our there, she saw that Vegeta was already in his blue full-body spandex and Saiyan armor. Probably heading out to train. She thought. She absent-mindedly waved goodbye to him before returning her attention to her clothes. She jumped, startled, when she heard him speak, using her name for the first time since the nightmare ordeal began again.

"Because I don't intend for you to get taken away like everything else, Bulma."


End file.
